On The Road Again?

 

I've been traveling virtually with Butch! 

As he delivers huge manufactured homes to their waiting owners.

Never leaving my seat at my computer, 

 Across and back Cali (as he calls it) 

Near the Mexican border, Malibu, Havasu, 

At the ocean shore, up in the mountains 

Spectacular views

Almost as if I was his co pilot, riding shotgun as it were.

On Skype, we laugh, we commiserate together on the state of our democracy

I cry when I share stories of his Dad with him.

Without his companionship, his love, I'd be lost.

Always, just like Carol, there when grief suddenly overwhelms me--

Always, just like Carol, there to celebrate my virtual travels with Third Act too.

  

 

 And I've been in the northwoods of Wisconsin too, thanks to Carol.

On Skpe too, and in texts, our sisterhood has never been stronger

Her wisdom, her always knowing what to say--

When I'm in tears, when I'm frustrated, when I fear I'm unraveling

Is unequaled.

Without her gifts of love and grace, I don't know where I'd be now.

From a Third Act Educators Working Group Call

I've been traveling too with Third Act, 

meeting and welcoming educators across our nation and collaborating with other Third Actors-- 

from Alaska to Florida, California to New York, Florida to Maine (43 states total).  

And I've met, chatted with, laughed with, commiserated with the kindest, compassionate seniors who want to continue to make a difference. 

Those Zoom calls give me hope-- 

that underneath all the noise, the vitriol, and the violence are a massive group of Americans who hope to, plan to, act to, will --

stabilize our democracy and our planet. 

Collaborating with other elders, experienced Americans from across the country is invigorating and fun!

And as I give my all to the Educators Working Group, the National Welcome Calls, and the Google Docs on demand coaching--

I find some comfort 

And on the challenging days, I remind myself that all this is to honor my beloved Gus.

And to be entirely honest, on the road virtually is my preferred mode these days--

For everytime I get into the car

I'm alone

without my co pilot who had been always there with me

ever since I retired in 2004.

And I miss him more (if that's even possible)

His hand on my knee, 

his "ok" when he looked to the right to tell me it was ok to turn,

his choosing which CD -- Three Dog Night, Chuck Mangione

His checking out the forsythia in the spring

American flags coming home from Chardon

Or the Canadian geese in 2 different locations.

Some days I can almost smile and others a tear or two roll down my cheek.

"Grief is surprising.  Not at first, when you are prepared for it to pick you up and slam you against the rocky shore, but later, in a month or two or ten.  Anyone who thinks the shortest distance between two points is a straight line does not understand grief." --Steve Leder The Beauty of What Remains, p 137